As with any change, divorce brings opportunity

29 Nov
Divorce definition

It’s a fact of life that when you’re dating in your 20’s you feel invincible, attractive and the future seems a long way off. The opportunities for romance in your social universe are just dropping off the trees like ripe fruit. We’ve still got hair, we can go out 5 nights a week and still keep going! Staying in shape even seems a little easier. Ah those heady and endless days of youth in which romance is rampant and readily available.

It’s shortly after that we start to glide into our early 30’s and begin to spend a fortune on 30th birthday parties. This follows the next few years when we seem to be budgeting for at least 3 weddings every summer. It is indeed the general pattern of life that then falls neatly and sometimes chaotically into the arrival of little people, pets and a mortgage. Keeping up with the double-barreled surname, neighbors and the UN negotiations to get our sprogs into the right Kindy or School? Not to mention the horror of the judgmental school run and the business dinner party.

Then one day we wake up and say, where am I? Who am I? I’m not the same person I was in University. In fact I’m miles away from who I was in my 20’s. Now I’m flailing around in my 40’s or 50’s dealing with the dark storm cloud of the dreaded D word. Divorce is something that can rip your psyche in two and polarize you in ways you never expected. The emotional and physical impact is not to be underestimated, nor is the rebuild.

Now let’s spin all of this positively in the opposite direction because the end of something also spells opportunity. The opportunity to use your life experience, wisdom and common sense to be the architect of a new romantic existence. You may at first really enjoy just being you and having the space to decide what you want to do with your time and resources on your own terms, bliss. But there will be reminders around you all the time that you are now single and without partner. If you love having a companion along for your life adventure, now is the perfect opportunity to reverse the past relationship mistakes and get it right.

The saying ‘Life is too short’ may be cliché but it is so true. There is literally no time to waste. This is why when working with an expert Matchmaker you can, narrow the field to what you really want. You won’t need to mess about in noisy bars, or spending hours online trawling the bar scene from Star Wars. Sitting with a flat white scrolling through the conveyor belt lottery of Tinder, should be eschewed in favour of coffee with an expert Matchmaker talking honestly, frankly and clearly about your romantic objectives.

Just as divorce can give a man or a woman the adrenaline shot they need to reboot their careers to pay for the maintenance and separation of assets, likewise it may be just what you need to refresh the romantic landscape of your life. What has happened to you may have left you very wounded and distrustful of ever giving your heart away again. The psychological approach to Matchmaking taken by a professional can help you to navigate this emotional minefield. It can also lead you to a second chance at love you never thought was possible.

Divorce can galvanize or ruin a career or your love life. The idea is to seize the day. Love yourself first and know that it’s an opportunity to be more selective. And with expert help identify a truly compatible and sensational happily ever after for your heart and soul.

 

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by Rachel Vida MacLynn

Founder & CEO

Rachel Vida MacLynn is reputed as being a world-leading matchmaking and dating expert. Registered as a Chartered Psychologist with the British Psychological Society, Rachel advocates a professional matchmaking approach based on psychological principles and professional consultation. Rachel also sits on the Board of Advisors for the Matchmaking Institute.More by this author