31 Jul

By Martin Turner

As we continue to enjoy the tennis season (the US open is around the corner) here is our Vida sporting anecdote on the game of exclusive matchmaking.

When it comes to exclusive matchmaking do you really want it to be a game?  Is it about winning? When we go on the first date and think we performed brilliantly, is it love 15 or love all? A conversation that is as thrilling as a 28 hit rally can be really stimulating, but only if it’s not a competition. And if you’re going to make a racquet, make sure it’s genuine giggles and laughter or an interested and enthusiastic but not embarrassingly loud return.

What you don’t want to do when dating is play games. Make a straight forward serve of conversation and be you, on form, and serving well. Be careful to avoid overly emotional needy anecdotes that are too close to the line or you’ll get called out. Keep the conversation rally fresh, energetic being your best self. Don’t be beige, or white, this isn’t Wimbledon, think US Open, the Williams Sisters and show up in the full Technicolor version of your personality. This is no time to cower in the face of a potential first service. Likewise, while you want to win don’t try so hard to serve a conversation ace. You may leave your dating partner gasping and stunned for where to go next in the conversation.  A gentle rally to get into the pace and then you can lob a sweet story or a compliment in their direction. There’s nothing wrong with a little flirtation and a lunge forward to the net with a “you have really lovely eyes”. Or how about a sprinkle of vulnerability like “I was nervous about coming here today, but now that I am with you I feel really relaxed”, followed by a warm smile.

What you don’t want to do is grand slam down a point of view or a personal preference, because in the case of the men it will be new balls please. If you can keep the conversation flowing steadily throughout your date, you’re more likely to go to a five set exclusive matchmaking dazzler.

Leave the game on the court where it belongs. When serving for the exclusive love match, it’s the real you that will win through every time. Love yourself, show up as yourself, woo your date and proclaim “love all”!

Martin Turner has had a 25 year global career in events which resulted in the book Travel Secrets in 2010 and a new career in journalism and lecturing. A recent graduate of the American Academy of Dramatic Art, he has won his way into the heart of the VIDA team while zooming about the planet on new assignments and escapades.


by Rachel Vida MacLynn

Founder & CEO

Rachel Vida MacLynn is reputed as being a world-leading matchmaking and dating expert. Registered as a Chartered Psychologist with the British Psychological Society, Rachel advocates a professional matchmaking approach based on psychological principles and professional consultation.More by this author

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