All through our lives we are told what to do. Our elders and experts have the authority to tell us to eat our vegetables, do our homework, tidy our rooms and pay our tax. It really is one of the joys of life being an independently self-funded adult to make decisions about what, when, where and how we go about our lives on our own terms. After all, we have rules, advice and direction piling in on us from all directions that we must reluctantly comply with, so any chance we have to exercise our right to say no or take our own route is rightfully accepted.
Once we have left the shackles of parental guidance, we fight fiercely for our right to say no. Even at work we strive hard to get to the top so we can make the rules and have more freedom of movement. So when we invest financially in our personal future by engaging a professional matchmaker, are we really willing to take the advice we have paid for, or will we throw in the towel at the first date hurdle and say emphatically, “no, not for me”? After all, from our well informed experience of romance via films, television, and books, aren’t we supposed to be ignited by the first spark of romance and feel giddy with enchantment on the first date? “That would be simply divine” said the good fairy as she dementedly waved her wand in a shower of sparkles over the first date. “Not necessarily” said the bad fairy, AKA experienced Matchmaker as she taps out some ashes from her cigar on good fairy’s dress. Psychology says there is so much more to long-lasting fulfilling relationships than a mere spark, which can easily burn out.
For those who have really done their epic romance homework, the best and most spectacular relationships and ‘happily ever afters’ usually rise from the ashes of initial disinterest. There has been some real thought put into who you have been introduced to and why. Is it always going to work? No, but it’s essential that you do give it a chance. It’s really quite amazing how you can grow to really love someone in a much deeper way than you will from the quick hit to your endorphins as a result of the brief I fancy you. So now that as an adult you have grown to love mushrooms that you once hated as a child, give your professional Matchmaker the benefit of the doubt and give a second or third date a go before making a blanket decision of no. You may be surprised how romance can sneak up on you when you least expect it to and completely by design.